We all have habits and habits make up the daily routines of our day, the lifestyle we lead, the friends we keep, and the places in which we surround ourselves. A habit takes 21-28 days to become part of our makeup. Our neuro-pathways get formed by repetition and practice and like driving the same route every day on the highway, or free way as I like to call it, we get into the zone day in and day out. Here’s the deal, not all habits are bad and not all habits are good. They are what they are-everything in moderation. Habits stick. Ever try breaking one? It takes effort and a shift in perception.


Here are the top 8 habits I will not give up:


1.     Meditating first thing in the morning - this is my time to connect with my guides, my peeps on the other side, my future higher self and the perfect time to express gratitude even if it’s to say I am alive and I am breathing. The informational downloads I get come through all through the day. And I have learned to follow it without any arguments-a hard one for me to follow.


2.     Wearing perfume, and not patchouli or any other soft scent that murmurs I’m nice and sweet…mine screams I’m here, I’m bold, I’m adventurous and I’m one of those naughty, no rules following dames.  My preference these days runs towards Hermes Un Jardin Sur Le Nil  and Ami’s nectar Oshandi. I remember my mom wearing Pateau Joy and being able to know she was on her way long before the door opened. Perfumes are as old as the Goddesses and the priestesses who teded the eternal flames. It’s a nod to Her and a nod to all the fairies creating the nectars and tending to our flowers, mountains, streams, lakes, and oceans. Sorry to those who are allergic, but just think they’ll be able to run for the hills before I even walk in the door. I like it strong and overpowering.


3.     Writing – Practice, practice, practice. What I’ve learned is that writing requires a vulnerability to show my inner most thoughts, feelings, and fears. I have to bare my soul. The deeper and I go, the more universally it can touch others. So I bare my soul every day. Some of it gets published and some of it stays put until it's time to come out.


4.     Hot showers in the morning and hot baths in the evening and a dip in the ocean as much as possible – water, water, water. I just know I was a mermaid in another lifetime. It’s refreshing and cleanses me from all the vibes I may have picked up during the day. I add a little, or a lot of Epsom Salt, depending on how much of a detox I need.


5.     Hot lemon water – this is part of my beauty routine. I’m not kidding. It takes the pallor out of my skin and gives me that I’ve just been fucked (I tried the symbols but it didn’t feel the same on paper-so sorry to all those offended eyes-you know who you are) glow. And since I am newly divorced that look isn’t coming from anywhere else.


6.     FaceTime with my sister, Lela, who lives in Rome and has for the past 15 years…long story…she can’t leave because of a custody battle that has spanned over a decade. Just think I’ve been married, divorced, married and divorced in that time. Leave it to the Italians to take it slow and easy.


7.     Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and of Orange County and of New York (not so interested in New Jersey or Atlanta, especially now that NeNe is going). I need a little junk food in my life, and since I don’t eat it, (unless someone is forcing a couple of Doritos down my throat…The lady doth protest…and all that). Watching the franchise RHOBH and OC (or whatever city they come up with next). Hey, maybe they’ll want to do a RHOJ (Real Housewives of Jupiter). I can be the token bohemian, multicultural, bi-racial, thrice divorced divorcee that lives off Jupiter Island.


8.     Amy Schumer…Need I say more? That bitch rocks. I saw the movie with my 16yo son, Red, my mom, and my lesbian friend (That’s like saying with my black friend to indicate that I am hip and multicultural…I am but labels still feel weird). And by the way, the movie Trainwreck made me realize that my life has been even more of a train wreck at times and I’m still standing and so will you. I’ve walked the Walk of Shame in my outfit from the night before that looked super cute when my friends and I picked it out as we were pre-gaming the bar scene. Now it looks like I just got tips from the whore down the street at the corner of hopeless and desperate. Instead of that just been fucked glow, I have the just been fucked hair, in combination last night’s makeup now smeared as I tried to use spit and a corner of a towel to wipe my face. Nice. I’ve felt unlovable and have sabotaged good relationships and kept bad ones going just to save face. But guess what? The only way out is through.